Hopeless

Today at the local Ethical Society meeting, where I attend, we had our regular third Sunday roundtable "Living Ethics Discussion." It's typically a day for discussing our own personal challenges and ethical dilemmas, bouncing our concerns and ideas off of our community, which is awesome. 

Today's discussion ended up focusing, primarily, on "the hopelessness of the upcoming generation." 

I don't believe anybody said that, word for word, but that was the gist.

Upon coming home, my husband, who had been home with a baby, asked what we'd talked about. "About how younger generations feel hopeless and about how we should smile more at our neighbors."

He laughed. 

It's not his fault. Half of what I say is setup for comedic effect. Unfortunately that one wasn't supposed to be.

And in that moment, a sweet, sweet, hopeful part of me died, and I found myself wanting Trump to win the 2024 election.

I AM the upcoming generation, and I do feel hopeless. Not half as hopeless as people younger than me, but fairly hopeless even with all the privilege that comes with my equity. *wipes tears with savings account.*

I am incredibly lucky that I'm not a 90's kid, and that I was able to sneak in and buy a condo at just the right time, which made eventual home ownership possible for my family. I am incredibly lucky that my husband didn't major in elementary education, or work in carpet cleaning, or some OTHER field which pays below accepted standards of living. (Thank god not everyone gets to follow their dreams...)

We are living in a late-stage capitalist hellscape, where the sick have to beg for donations online, the minimum wage is stagnant despite rising inflation, employers punish their employees for personal emergencies, and the average American cannot afford to own a home in 99% of the country. NINETY-NINE PERCENT. Living is no longer a right.

So why did I toss it all to abandon and want TRUMP to win the next election? 

Because things are really really really really REALLY REALLY REALLY awful, and I'm sick and tired of 50% of my voting options (Democrats) refusing to do anything about it.

The president that I voted for is using MY tax dollars to fund a war over in Israel which is, frankly, a genocide. Where Israel literally TORTURED UN officials, and my president wants to pretend that that's not disqualifying for any type of assistance. And, as information is spreading globally about Palestine, via social media and TikTok in particular, about just how bad things actually are there, on the ground, my presidents states that he's willing to ban TikTok. 

SIR. People cannot afford to LIVE. DO SOMETHING USEFUL, not... 

No, I could go on. Instead, I'm going to turn to Trump's 2024 goals, and genuinely ask why I shouldn't want these things: 

"Give the President Unchecked Power Over Federal Agencies."

Will this change literally anything for me today? Hells. Maybe they'll stop putting poison in my food.

"Restore the President's Authority to Bypass Congress."

Congress is already an inefficient joke available to the highest bidder. Bypass 'em. They're not doing anything useful anyway. 

"Appoint a Special Prosecutor to 'go after' Biden."

...Okay? (Oh no...)

"Use the Justice Department to Get Revenge on All of His Enemies."

Who are Trump's enemies? Because so far, nobody's stopped him. Is he saying he might actually get the justice department to take down people in positions of power when they do something wrong? Fair is fair.

I wish I had enemies.

"Expand Presidential Immunity."

I'd love to see them expand it more than they already have. You can literally throw a coup, and nothing happens. Let's start executing people in the streets without criminal convictions. Lets. Why not.

"Purge the Civil Service."

Fire bad apples? 

Freakin' burn the whole orchard to the ground. I don't care anymore. I have a government job. So fire me. One thing we've all learned, from capitalism, is that anyone is disposable. That's what these bootstraps are for! 

"Install Thousands of Loyalists Throughout the Federal Government."

Hell - at least this way we'll know WHO bought them!

"Put Flying Cars in Americans' Driveways."

... Are they literally saying that I could afford a flying car if Trump became president?...

There's more. Obviously there's lots more, but this is what hopelessness looks like. Are you telling me that things might just "change"?

When children are "attention-seeking," any attention is good attention, even if that attention is yelling at them. As a young person struggling against late-stage capitalism, any change is good change, at this point - even if it's just a change for the worse. 

At least then it'll be more obvious that it's not my fault, and I can go a little easier on myself, and REALLY let that hope go as I embrace total, complete nihilism. 

Bad things happen to good people, and sometimes it's their government's fault. 

I don't think the Democrats deserve a win, right now. For all their talk, they're still not honestly doing what the people want. The Republican party is dying, but the Democrats ought to kick the bucket as well. Nobody is doing what's in the best interest of people. And if it takes a housefire for people to realize the seriousness of the situation, and DEMAND more options than two aged white men, then let it happen. If Biden wins, the Democrats will happily coast along for more decades to come - accepting money from private donors quietly, while patting themselves on the backs that at least they're not Republicans. 

I want better options. I don't want either one. Do we seriously have to pull a weapon and hold it to America's head to be offered a livable solution? Because if that's what we have to do - in the form of electing Trump - maybe we just have to do it. 

So we can live.